As a Temple University Culture and Identity Envoy, I had the privilege of being invited to John Cabot University, an American university also located in Rome. I attended an event called Living in the Diaspora, hosted by a combination of different student identity and cultural organizations. It was an open discussion, roundtable forum where students on the panel, as well as students in the audience, got to share their own personal thoughts and experiences of living in a diaspora.
There were students from a variety of nationalities and backgrounds: Arab, Black, African, Latino, Asian, White, Italian, heterosexual, queer, interfaith; all of us representing the intersectionality of these identities. I honestly did not know what to expect when I agreed to attend, but I’m so glad I did. What unfolded for the next ninety minutes while I was there felt like pure magic. I laughed; I cried; I felt seen and understood, but also scared to speak up and be witnessed. I recognized myself becoming more aware but, at the same time, also more confused- all from this one experience. It was an emotional roller coaster, to say the least! Most importantly though, I left me wanting to learn more.
Some of the students who shared about their personal experience talked about how misunderstood they feel by their new peers, but also by their own families. Some spoke of the embarrassment they feel for the way they speak English, as well as having feelings of shame for not knowing how to speak their family’s native language. There were students who talked about how, while living in the U.S., all they wanted was to fit in and be seen as American, but then also having to reconcile the feelings that come with not being fully seen as their nationality of origin when they’re back home. There were also mixed emotions about what it would mean to return to their country long term: are they taking the opportunity to be abroad for granted when so many others from their country can’t, especially if they know their parents sacrificed to get them to where they are today? Are they backsliding by having the enriched experience of living and studying abroad but still wishing to move back home, even if it means less opportunities?
The biggest unanswered question for most of the participants was: “Will I ever truly feel at home where I am?”
Before coming to Rome, I would have sympathized with them, but I definitely would not have been able to empathize with them. Even now, I know I’ll never completely understand their experiences. They’ve been living in a diaspora for the majority of their life; it’s only been two months for me. At the very least, I now have a basic understanding, as well as a new appreciation, for the struggles they face. I believe, at our core, that is what each of us is searching for: someone to acknowledge our pain and sit with us through it so that we don’t have to experience it alone.
Although it’s been challenging for me to adjust to living in a different country, I’m still incredibly grateful for this opportunity, and for all the things I’ve been learning, both in and outside of the classroom. The Living in the Diaspora event was incredibly helpful for processing my own emotions, but more than that, it opened my eyes to what so many other people must be feeling and experiencing when they come to the U.S. from another country, whether it be for vacation, school, work, or maybe because they were forced to flee their own country for safety.
In summary, I think that’s what I’ve truly learned so far while being in Rome. It’s that we’re all fighting battles, no matter who are or where we are, but not everyone has a safe place, the right words, or even the same language to be able to openly share about it and seek support.
My hope for us all is that we’ll learn to be kinder to everyone we meet no matter where we go, or where we choose to call home.
Artwork
This experience inspired me to create a painting specifically because I love how easily paint mixes together, and how free flowing the actual act of painting can be. I feel like that’s exactly what the roundtable discussion was: a free flowing combination of everyone’s thoughts and experiences mixed together to create a space of healing and support.
When I first thought about mixing colors together, I wanted to play with the idea of mixing varying shades of brown, beiges, and tans, together to symbolize all the different cultures and ethnicities that came together at the event. But how? And what could I do to make it representative of our time together in Italy, even if just for the night?
I am an emotional eater. I have been for years! So when I’m dealing with a lot of heavy emotions, like I have been while adjusting to Rome, I tend to try to soothe myself with food, specifically dessert. One night after a day of classes, I was craving something sweet. And that’s when I found it- the perfect representative with just the right combination of colors.
Tiramisù!
Upon further research, I learned that tiramisù translates to “pick me up,” which is exactly what I was hoping it would do that night, and precisely what attending Living in the Diaspora did for me and many others in the room that night.
I hope you enjoy it!
Learn more about the Culture & Identity Envoy program and getting involved at Temple Rome.